Tales from the Testosterone Zone: Let's Waste Time With Harry Potter

Like the rest of the world, I anxiously await the release of Book 7 and Movie 5. Actually, Wizard is more excited than I am, but I try to keep him in check. I found the following meme on A Squib's Life and thought I'd answer these questions myself.

Which would you prefer for a pet: Hedwig, Crookshanks, Trevor, Fang or Fawkes?

Crookshanks.

What would you see in the Mirror of Erised?

Me, at a comfortable size 12 or 14. WineGuy in size 44 pants. Everybody healthy and happy.

What subject would be your favorite at Hogwarts? (assume a nice and competent teacher): Potions, Transfiguration, Charms, Divination, Herbology, Care of Magical Creatures or Defense Against the Dark Arts?

Divination.

Which would be your least favorite?

Defense Against The Dark Arts: too much like courtroom litigation. You have to be really fast on your feet, and I am not.

In which House would the Sorting Hat place you?

Well, I couldn't decide for myself, so I went to Sorting-Hat.com:

I'm a Ravenclaw!

"Here in wise old Ravenclaw,
If you've a ready mind,
Those of wit and learning,
Will always find their kind."

However, if you would describe me as brave, chivalrous, nervy and daring, then I might be a Griffindor.

Could you see Thestrals?

No.

Which Quidditch position would you prefer to play: Keeper, Beater, Chaser, or Seeker?

Beater.

Which magical object would be most useful to you, Sneak-o-scope, Foe Glass, Time-turner, Remembrall, or Pensieve?

Time-turner.

What would be your preferred Hogwarts sweet: Chocolate Frogs, Bertie's Every Flavor Beans, Acid pops, Cockroach cluster?

Acid Pops because I love sour candies.

Pumpkin juice, butterbeer, or elf-made wine?

Butterbeer.

Is your best friend more like Ron, Hermione, Luna, Neville, Ginny or Hagrid?

Hermione, absolutely.

Is the most toxic person in your life more like Lockhart, Snape, Umbridge, Malfoy, Filch or Fudge?

Umbridge.

Is your most embarrassing relative most like Aunt Petunia, Uncle Vernon, Dudley, or Percy Weasley?

Blood relative: Aunt Petunia
In-law: Percy Weasley.

What shape would your patronus take?

Badger.

What is Your Patronus? Version 1

Your Patronus is the Badger! The badger is a symbol of aggressiveness, passion and drive. He is also the mascot for Hufflepuff. As your Patronus, the Badger will bite and claw to protect you. Congratulations!That your Patronus is a badger says that you are very driven in whatever you do. When you enjoy something, you go at it with all of your heart. Unfortunately, you also tend to be aggressive, and this can lead to a bossy attitude. Try to keep that aggression in check, and you'll be a wonderful witch or wizard!
Take this quiz!